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Paul J. Wong

Help! I've Been Diagnosed With An Anxiety Disorder


Most statistics in Canada will say that about 1 in 5 people will struggle with a mental health issue at some point in their life. A point of interest concerning statistics is that research (that is conducted well) focuses on what is reported. This means that if 1 in 5 Canadians report a mental health condition, there is a likelihood that the actual numbers may be of a higher percentage. With this in mind, I thought it could be helpful to focus on a few of the more common issues that we face to help normalize the experience and conversation

In North America, we tend to rely on using the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for Mental Health Disorders (5th edition) for diagnosing mental health disorders. In normal, every day terms, it means that the manual (or DSM-5) is considered the road map for doctors, psychiatrists and psychologists to reference when conducting an assessment. The fact that there have been 5 of these editions (as well as revisions) means that the list has been growing over the years of what is considered a deviation from normal human behaviour. A good book (or video) that I would recommend on the background of the DSM and how it came to be is called "Saving Normal" by Allen Frances. Essentially, when somebody is being assessed for a diagnosis, the health professional gauges what the person is experiencing and if enough markers are present and reported, the person is diagnosed. In the winter of 2011, I had the privilege of being assessed and diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder, which I'll address in a future article.

One word that I can use to describe the experience of struggling with a mental health issue is "lost". If you have ever been lost somewhere, you may be able to relate to the feeling of uneasiness in your chest and stomach, the confusion you feel in your mind and the panic you are thrown into as you try to sort out what is really going on and where you are. Add in some dysfunctional and often dreadful thoughts and you have a partial view of what it is like to struggle with anxiety. It is not fun, it's not just in your head and it is not your fault. It happens to more people than you realize. But the good news is that this is an issue that is manageable. For any of you struggling with anxiety, here's a few thoughts to help you as you wade through the murky waters...

Anxiety is (more often than not) rooted in a future that has yet to pass.

When somebody enters my office for the first time and is looking for help sorting out what exactly is going on, the conversation often steers towards what is to come. Anxiety hits us hard when we think about the impending doom around the corner. One thing that is notable is the fact that more often than not, anxiety is present because of a past hurt or event that we call trauma. Belittling this fact only devaluates and minimizes the validity of the emotion. As we wade through the hurt through therapy, we then look to the resilience of the person who has wrestled through this storm. We also recognize that resilience is one of the essential ingredients of strength. Utilizing these strengths, we can eventually come to recognize that we have what it takes to withstand the calamities that life can throw at us, giving us more power than we thought we had.

Anxiety can be our friend as much as our enemy

Another aspect of understanding anxiety is that there are times when anxiety can be helpful to us. Imagine a life without anxiety. At first it sounds heavenly, until we realize that our naturally ingrained warning system of danger has been deactivated. Sometimes anxiety can be helpful, in the way that pain can be helpful. Pain and anxiety can be warning lights to tell us of things that could potentially hurt us. This is a good thing. The problem arises when the warning light comes on in our lives when it doesn't need to be through a process called transference, suddenly causing us to avoid situations, people and events. Understanding the role that anxiety plays (or should play) can be helpful as we begin to understand our ongoing relationship with this emotion.

Anxiety doesn't have to take control... and neither do you

Control is another big ingredient of what causes anxiety. For many people who have experienced traumatic events, the reason they have their anxiety is because at some point in their life, they were placed in a position where they have little or no control (that's trauma again). Autonomy is an important part of natural human development and when a child is denied having a voice or some sort of control, both inner and outer chaos will ensue. Folks who tend to struggle with anxiety often feel as if it is up to them to make sure that something (or everything) will be okay. Imagine it being up to you to make sure that universe will keep running as it should! Not a fun feeling. The good news is that you aren't in charge of making sure it all goes according to plan. I suppose this is where faith plays a role. Faith in a higher power, faith in the universe, faith in circumstance, with in the process of life. Yes, it is easier said than done, but when we recognize that it is not up to us to govern the universe, a little weight can be lifted up off our shoulders.

Taking medication and seeking therapy is not a sign of weakness but a sign of recovery

Finally, we look to one final aspect of anxiety-perception of prescription. For some, anxiety has a voice and it sounds like a person or people in the past who have either hurt us, expected something of unrealistic us or someone who we assumed had thought or said something about us that was harmful. For someone struggling with anxiety, this voice can cause us to freeze and feel incredibly small. It is unfortunate that we live in a society where shame is used as a weapon, telling us that we should be able to handle life without _________. The truth is, it is not a sign of weakness but a sign of strength when someone utilizes a resource that will help them in the long run-be it in the form of medication, psychotherapy or self-care.

If you or someone you know is struggling with anxiety, I encourage you to reach out. As Canadians (and especially in Ontario) you have many avenues to find support as you manage this normal human emotion that we have classified and stigmatized. Some of these avenues have been paid for by the government, including covered costs of medication for anyone under the age of 25. Brief counselling and support groups are often covered through hospital programs and local health clinics. Even my own services as a therapist are often covered through extended health coverage, Employee Assistance Plans and claimable on our income tax as a verified health expense. There are many avenues available to you just waiting for you to reach out and ask for help. And hey-if you are ever in the Wellington Region or looking to connect via online video, I'm only a phone call or email away.

Until next time,


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